Why Questions Matter
Answering student questions is one of the most important parts of Comprehensive Sexual Health Education (CSHE). Questions, especially anonymous ones, give students a safe way to express curiosity and get accurate information without fear of embarrassment. Creating routines to protect anonymity for young people while asking questions is best practice to support safety and learning in this part of CSHE. Creating this space builds trust, supports learning, and ensures all students have access to the answers they need.
If educators don’t provide clear, accurate answers, young people will often turn to friends, social media, or other sources that may give them misinformation. By responding directly and respectfully, educators help prevent myths from spreading and ensure students are guided by facts rather than rumors or misinformation.
The 5-Step Model for Answering Questions
- Identify the motivation and type of question (to yourself)
– Information seeking
– “Am I normal?”
– Permission seeking
– Shock/slang
– Values-based
- Affirm the learner
– “That’s a great question.”
– “I hear this one a lot.”
- Correct misinformation and answer factual parts of the question
– “That’s not correct. The science shows us…”
- Explore a range of values (when needed) — without sharing your own. Use the S.O.Y. model:
– Some people… Other people… You and your trusted adult get to decide what’s best for you.
- Refer learners back to trusted adults and reliable resources
– “… It’s a good idea to talk with a healthcare provider, family member, or another trusted adult if you want more information.”
The 5-step model gives educators a clear, consistent framework for answering questions in ways that are:
- Respectful: Affirming students for their curiosity.
- Accurate: Correcting misinformation with facts.
- Balanced: Helping students explore a range of values without sharing personal beliefs.
- Supportive: Connecting learners to trusted adults and reliable resources.
Using this model helps educators feel more confident, ensures students get safe and age-appropriate responses, and keeps instruction aligned with laws, standards, and best practices.
Examples in Action
Example 1: “Can you get pregnant the first time you have sex?”
- Identify: Information-seeking.
- Affirm: “That’s an important question.”
- Correct: “Yes, pregnancy can happen the first time someone has vaginal sex if sperm reaches an egg. It doesn’t matter how many times someone has had sex before; if there are sperm and an egg, pregnancy is possible. Using birth control methods like condoms, the pill, or other options can greatly reduce the chance of pregnancy, but abstinence is the 100% effective method.”
- Explore values: Not needed.
- Refer: “You can find more information at Bedsider.org or talk to a healthcare provider.”
Example 2: “When is it okay to start dating?”
- Identify: Values-based.
- Affirm: “This is a common question.”
- Correct: “There is no one right age to start dating and many ways to define dating.”
- Explore values: “Some people might think it’s ok to date in elementary or middle school, others might think a person should wait until they are in high school, college, or even later to start dating. Some people might feel ready or interested in dating when they are younger, others might not be interested or ready until later in their life, and some people might choose not to date at all. That is going to look different for each individual person, and part of your job as you grow up is to figure out what’s right for you.”
- Refer: “It might be helpful to talk to a trusted adult about their feelings on when it’s appropriate to start dating and what their expectations for you are”
Addressing Values-Laden Topics
When questions bring up values:
(See page 11 of the Elementary FLASH Implementation Tool Kit)
- Focus on facts.
- Draw from laws, standards, and institutional practices.
- Explore a range of values they may encounter, without sharing your own.
Using this approach provides students with unbiased, accurate information and supports them in making informed decisions.
Remember: You Don’t Need Every Answer
It’s okay not to have a response right away. Take time to think, research, or ask colleagues. Lean on your curriculum, laws, and reliable resources. The goal isn’t perfection, it’s creating a safe, respectful space for student curiosity. You’ve got this!